Today Monkey turned seven. We treated her to a Waffle and fresh fruit breakfast, and a small morning cupcake birthday song and candle snuffing. She was presented with her gifts; a brand new bicycle, with basket and bell, helmet and pads from her Dad and I, a snuggly bear she had been eyeing from her brother, and a “surprise adventure” from her grandparents. Then she ran off to swim all day at Nana’s and Papa’s while we got down to the business of unpacking PODS.

This afternoon we went to Nana’s for a party and all of us splashed a bit, had a fancy Hannah Montana cake, and finished the day off in style. She will get another party next weekend, for her friends, but we had to delay it due to the completely unpacked state of our house. (Sea of boxes people… cardboard everywhere I look.)

Tonight I sit and review the day, thinking that I really saw how big she is getting today. I clearly saw the length in her stride, heard the clarity of her arguments, and realized her sudden height and strength. I saw the young lady who will lock horns with me in high school, and will likely slay dragons later in life.

I saw my big girl.

Once she nestled trustingly against me, gazing into my face and patting my chin with pudgy baby hands. Now, she negotiates for additional ice pops, or t.v. time, or another bedtime story. She wiggles whenever I try to cuddle, and can’t seem to take off fast enough once her feet are once again on the ground. She wants to ride bikes, see friends, and play outside unattended.

She is busy, building a life outside of mine, a life where my worldly advice will be derisively repeated to her friends with her eyes rolled heavenward. A life where I can’t fix her owies with “magic crayon band-aids” sealed with a kiss.

I am too aware of my mortality today. It has gone by so quickly I can almost believe she sprung forth from my skull fully formed. Where is my fuzzy duck headed girl? Maybe if I sneak in while she is sleeping, and plant another kiss on her forehead, I will rediscover her.