Oh Daddy I miss you so much.

I wish I could tell you all the things that have been going on lately, even though they aren’t momentous. Your quiet way of reassuring me made it easier to bear the heaviness of daily life in pain and illness.

I am struggling with this restriction. Whenever I feel I am getting a handle on the limits of my body they change, whenever I feel I can manage the demands of my illness it demands more. I get sicker and weaker and the pain gets worse and the world just passes me by faster with every passing day.

I feel as though I am caught in a river I am not quite strong enough to swim through and without you – my boulder at my back – I am going to be swept away.

Simply put, I’m scared and I want my Daddy.