Halloween, the time when the veil between the land of the living and the land of dead is at it’s thinnest. A time when we celebrate life by remembering death. While others carve pumpkins and stockpile candy I feel the rising of a deep well of sorrow. My ghosts aren’t scissor-handed or covered in gore but their power to wound seems inescapable. I am haunted by those who have left me behind. Tonight I sit, barely able to see the screen through half swallowed tears and I think about them. I miss them.

They say it is better to have loved and loss than to never have loved at all but I am fairly certain they were drunk when they said it. Only someone anesthetized by alcohol could fully mean that.

It’s true that I would never give back the precious time I had with these people. I cherish my memories. I just don’t think it’s entirely worth the trade offs. I am not sure getting hit by the knowledge that they are forever frozen behind me on the path while I soldier on is such a clear plus over not knowing their love.

Maybe it would be better to say Love is beautiful and magical, Death sucks forever, sadly they sometimes come together.