When I grow up…

Hello again, sorry about the break, my life has been very full these past few weeks, and I simply found myself unable to blog.

But here I am again.

Well, I have been relaxing with family and playing while I wait for the practice to pick up. I am going to start accepting cases in Domestic Relations in mid-January, and may even make it known that I will handle small Trusts and Estates issues. I did a codicil this past quarter and found it truly enjoyable, I am one of the those freaky people who actually loved property law and flourished in T&E.

I expect to be fairly busy when I sign on with the Office of the Child’s Representative, so I have to take my lazy time now. It has been an ambivilant time for me, as I long to start a successful career and at the same time am loathe to leave my little meepers without me. Otter especially, as he is used to having Mama all to himself and isn’t keen on sharing me with anyone, much less a pile of other children, regardless of their need or circumstances.

I never thought I would be the domestic goddess type, but I have truly loved being home with my kids. I actually took the time to learn to cook, for real, and now I enjoy putting together dishes that take longer to cook than they do to eat. I love to bake, and there is a nice calm that comes from cleaning. (Unlike most work it has a definable end to it, even if it will need to be done all over again the following day). At the end of two years of working from home and focusing more on the home, I find myself reluctant to change the status quo.

Sadly simple economics forces the change, so I can only grumble and feel gratefull that I got the two years I did. I know many people who are working three jobs a piece to keep their lives together in this economy, it hardly seems fair to grumble about having to work one.

It’s funny to me how desire change with our age. When I was younger I wanted to be a star in my career, rule my little corner of the world like royalty. After having one child I wanted a career that let me see more of her, and didn’t demand all my time. After two children, I barely want a career at all. I would be content staying home, keeping the family together, and dabbling in public interest law and volunteering. It’s easy to forget how frequently we evolve.

Who knows, maybe once I begin working more, I will desire even more time in the law, instead of feeling as though it’s intruding into my time in motherhood.

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Lack

I seem to lack things to say, or the desire to sit down and say them.

When I was starving for interaction, stuck home with a pre-verbal child all day, I blogged to stay sane.

Now, with two chattering children, the school on winter break, and all my friends and family in town, I can’t stand to blog.

I am out of words.

So I am taking a break!! I will see you all back after the new year with stories of the holidays, pictures of the fam, and more about the practice of law and motherhood.

Happy New Year!!

Twas the week before xmas…

and all through the house, the creatures were stirring, especially the mouse.

The stockings were precariously hung from the chimney,

strung on a heavy snowman, flake, Santa, and tree,

awaiting a tug from chubby baby hands,

to pull them from the mantle to crash when they land.

The children were increasingly sleepless in bed,

knowing sometime soon presents would greet them instead

of a sleep deprived mama and cranky mad dad,

wishing the holiday didn’t make sleeping so bad.

The recycling bin bulged with emptied bottles of wine,

as the parents sought strength in some alcohol time.

And yet, in the madness, a strange sense of calm

as the lights from the tree cast a glow like a balm,

and the family spent more time close and nearby,

as they peered out the window and watched the snow fly.

Though the season is rough it’s a great time of year,

to spend more snuggle time with the ones we hold dear.

Happy Holidays everyone!! We wish you the best!

Monkey magic…

Sometimes I feel as though my girl gets the raw end of the deal. As the older child she is often relied upon to take care of her own needs, if not sometimes her brothers. I try really hard not to use her as an in house sitter, but Otter is fascinated with his big sis and really follows her around everywhere.

Luckily for all of us, she is pleased with his attention and her increasingly responsible role as the much older sib.

Yesterday Otter reached out and held her hand. She was instantly teary-eyed, awed that he was holding her hand. When he let go she said “Now I can’t ever wash this hand again, or the baby love with wash off.” It was pretty sweet.

Amazingly, she has been able to sing him to sleep when there is a baby sitter, get him breakfast in the morning sometimes so we can sleep in a little more, and get him to try new foods by simply eating them in front of him. She has also taught him several new games, and given him some basic piano lessons. All in all she is a font of information for this young man.

This morning, as I attempted to snooze on the couch to recover from a late night and very early morning, Monkey woke me up with a peanut butter and honey sandwich. She had made me breakfast! I thanked her profusely for such a nice gesture, and ate a filling and delicious sandwhich. Of course, Otter helped me out by eating one half himself, a proud smile on his face all the while.

I am feeling pretty lucky to have kids with such a great personality. There are so many other ways this could have gone, but happily they are forming strong bonds and becoming friends.

Metamorphosis

metamorphosis
noun
transformation, mutation, transmutation, change, alteration, conversion, modification, remodeling, reconstruction; humorous transmogrification; formal transubstantiation.

…..

Once upon a time, in an eastern state far, far away, a young mother and newly transplanted attorny started a blog. It began as a way to keep in touch with those back home and to update them on the kids. The inital posts were long, rambling, and full of homesickness as I tried to adjust to a new life in a new land, that regardless of it’s location in my country of origin, was a alien to me as another planet.

After a while I got a job, and the stories began to share with you, my faithful readers, some of the strangeness that comes with mixing career and motherhood.

When the baby was born the posts focused back on parenting, and I tried to share my joy and frustration with handling a new small tyrant in my home.

Over the years I have shared photographs, recipes, parenting stories, advice, sorrow, joy, anger, and humor. You have been a lifeline, a connection to a world that often seems to race by unaware of my existence.

Now, I am home, back on my own turf and more sure of foot. And yet, the metamorphosis continues, for while I am secure in my location, my family, my friends, I am trembling, delicately hanging off a limb, with the start of my new practice.

So now, my blog becomes a place to put my fears, concerns, frustrations, and other news of a mother now trying to be her own boss, her own assistant, her own landlord, her own cleaning person. It has been a busy few months, and there has not been much time to write. However, I will be back.

After months of networking, phone calls, brochures, letters, dinners, lunches, drinks, parties, CLE’s, and other elbow rubbing events I am set to negotiate a contract with the State in the beginning of January. I will be taking on more environmental cases in the first of the year as well, and may be entering into the arena of preventing forclosures. The crickets have stopped chirping, scared away by the hustle and bustle of opportunity.

I thank you for checking in with me, and forigiving me my breaks from posting while I try this new endeavor.

AFGO.

Why is it that all things converge upon me whenever I agree to a tight deadline?
One week ago I accepted a new deadline for the filing of my Lizard case, this Monday Dec. 1st. I figured I could devote the week to research and writing, and with a little help from my family, get the complaint done with out killing myself. After all, I had a few models to follow, federal law to deal with, and others to review it once finished. Finally, I can always amend it later if I really, really have to.

So it began.

At first things were peachy. I read the case, researched some FWS publications, and got my mind around the issues. Then I got a sinus infection. I think. I still haven’t had time to visit the doctor to see.

Then Thanksgiving came along, and an old friend was in town so we threw him a little cocktail party.

A giant headache unlike nothing I have ever experienced before (and let me tell, after 21 years of migraines, I have had some doozys) beset me, along with intense sinus pressure and pain. I could barely stand to move, and I was staring at a bright screen for hours on end.

Monday came and Monkey began sniffling, coughing, and raising her internal temperature. Thus, she stayed home sick, adding another ball to juggle while I frantically composed analysis and argument.

However, she was just sick enough to get into trouble, ask for food or drink every 37 seconds, and generally cause a ruckus. Sadly this illness continued through Tuesday as well.

Otter began cutting another tooth, so he forewent solid foods and asked for milk, almost constantly, for four days straight. He also woke up several times a night, every night, and woke up before 6 a.m., pretty much guaranteeing that my brain turned to mush.

Then, two of my other cases had emergent issues arise, resulting in phone calls and work on those files. My contact for my CFI business saw me on Tuesday, which was wonderful, but which also cost several more hours of available work time.

I finished the complaint last night and emailed it off. Today I have to edit it. Tomorrow I plan to sleep for the whole friggin day.

There has to be some way to sneakily set aside time for emergency work. If I tell anyone, or act differently at all, the Universe seems to create a bavarian clusterfuck in my life.

I know, don’t tell me, it’s just another fucking growth opportunity.