Monthly Archives: May 2008

Law

Nostaligia for pain…

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One of the odd side effects of a law degree is that you develop a liking for a certain kind of pain. The stress, expense, and cruelty of three years studying in the Socratic Method becomes comforting to you. You start law school terrified out of your mind only to discover, years later, that you are nostalgic for the unending study hours and heavy workload.

Today we cleaned out the garage and I came across my orientation handbook. Tucked inside was a receipt for my first year books. I still remember going to the bookstore to get those books, expecting to go from row to row grabbing as many used books as I could to reduce my cost. I remember the shock I felt when the clerk steered me to the large stack of pre-packed white moving boxes that contained our books. I remember wondering how I was going to get my box back to the car.

Then I looked down at the total on the receipt, and I remembered paying nearly an 18th of my year’s living expense allowance for that box of books.

$708.30.

Sickeningly, I wish I could do it all again.

Ask and you Shall

Riding on the short bus…

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I am a piece of shit.

One who puts her kids at risk for kidnapping by flashing her high earning profession (oh yes, we environmental attorneys are raking in the dough, just ask the creditors from my student loan company) and pictures of her kids on the internet. They are a ransom just waiting to happen.

I am all over the place, and I can’t get it together.

At least that is what the new full time reviewer, Queen Mutha, over at Ask and Ye Shall Receive had to say. Really, what does one say to that? “There’s no accounting for taste?” My knee jerk reaction was “Well fuck you!” but really, I was the idiot who asked for the opinion of a bunch of reviewers at Iwillfuckingtearyouapart.blogspot.com. That was all me.

Seriously though, having thought about it, there is some truth to what she had to say. I am all over the place, I don’t have my shit together. That is just my life. I am trying to create a world in which I can practice law and stay home with my kids. As it turns out, like many SAHM’s discovered before me, the kids just take over. I have accepted and settled one case in one year. Luckily for me, I was able to take this time out and spend it with my babies, but there hasn’t been much law for me to write about. There has been parenting to write about, and memes to play in, and hardships to discuss, but not much law.

Happily that will change, and as it does, I will be able to express my frustrations with working and parenting, law and motherhood. For now, it’s just motherhood.

I do think I need a new template, but I have been having a hard time finding one that has a low learning curve. I just don’t have time to spend hours on my template right now. I will keep looking though, for something cleaner, and attempt to balance the stuff I want to point out to people with a clean look.

Some good comes of all things. That review pissed me off. It made me look back over my blog, and the past two years. It made me feel protective of my words, and the feelings I have shared. It turns out, I like myself. I like my blog. As it is.

I don’t care if I no one subscribes to it, or if only my mother and few stalwart friends read it. I am going to keep riding the short bus, with a smile.