A few male friends informed me recently that I do not fully recognize how wonderful my husband is. I think they suppose that I take him for granted because I don’t talk about him much. Sometimes I will mention how much certain behaviors of his drive me crazy but other than that I pretty much don’t gush about his biceps, his fantastic personality, and how blissfully happy he makes me.
This isn’t because he lacks amazing biceps and a fantastic personality. Nor is it because I am not blissfully happy. It is simply that after nearly seven years together our fires are, as Hubby puts it, banked. (Actually, he described our fires as being an underground pig roast, with succulent fat dripping into the coals. Banked but delicious. This has led to me teasing him endlessly about sticking an apple in the mouth of our relationship and roasting it on a spit. It drives him crazy.)
I think they don’t understand exactly how much I do appreciate my husband. It’s not just that he earns a solid living, does dishes, likes a clean house, and is a helpful partner. I appreciate him because after nearly seven years of nigh constant contact I still actually like him. I like to be with him every day and I miss him when he is gone. I like to do everything and nothing with him.
Take right now for example. I am sitting at my desk and he is at his. He is torturing himself by looking at the houses we can’t afford on Google and I am writing in my blog. We are listening to Dave Matthews. Otter is asleep and Monkey is watching a movie. The house is peaceful and short of an occassional comment about the number of homes on the market or the fact that I am personally responsible for most of his gray hair, we are quiet. We are together, as one, at peace.
This is one of my favorite things about being married to a man with whom I can simply be.
I don’t mention all his wonderful qualities to all my friends all the time because they are the daily constant in my life. Without him my life would be less lovely, less full of love. I recognize this every day and simply love and enjoy him. Why do I need to tell everyone else about the love and enjoying I do? He knows I value him, I know I value him, enough said.
I like that our fires are banked, that our passion has become something we can warm ourselves with instead of something that sends sparks into the sky and carries with it the risk of burning. I am pleased to simply be with this man, forever.