Sorry about the rather whiney nature of the past two weeks, our house has been invaded by the sick monsters! However, today, on this crisp cold morning, when all noses have been wiped and all children are healthy, I feel…cheery!

Okay, Otter still has copious snot faucet abilities, and the cutest cough I have ever heard, but he is no longer covered head to toe in a rash, nor is he feverish beyond the pale. I never thought I would be thrilled to see rivers of snot, but I am.

Monkey has avoided the flu (furiously knocking on wood) and is off at school, happily ready to face the day. (It is playground day, she is happily ready to face playground day, any day.)

I have driven the little men with pickaxes out of my skull and bade them never to return. (Evil pickaxe wielding devils.)

My roommate has begun speaking in what he refers to as “typo” while sifting through the mail.
“Grabage, grabage, grabage…. garbage…didn’t misspell it that time…. grabage…. it always happens when I start typing too fast…. grabage.”
It’s never dull at my house, as long as you tune in and listen.

Well, now that I am well, the kids are well, and the hubby is well, I have to work today! I need to start researching my Motion for Summary Judgment in earnest. I was waiting until settlement seemed unlikely, so I wouldn’t drive up the cost of the litigation. However, now it seems unlikely, so off to the online library I will go, seeking past decisions to back my case up!!

I will also have to visit the grocery store today, so my family doesn’t lack milk, meat, eggs, cereal, and fruit. (I can make a lot of bean and onion soups still though!!)

Why is it the day after you have worked your tush off treating the sick is always the busiest of all.

are picking, picking, picking at my brain.
The sun is piercing in it’s brightness.
Sounds make me want to cry.

It’s migraine time again.

Is it really true that the baby is extra cantankerous today or am I lacking in ability to deal?
Have an inordinate number of emergency vehicles actually driven past my house this morning or am I just noticing them more?
Is there truly a significant increase in honking horns on this day’s commute or do I simply have an increased sensitivity?

There seems to be no dark, no quiet, and no way to escape the tiny men with pickaxes….picking at my brain.

Here are a few of the random moments I have jotted down with the laudable intention of turning them into a blog post of great humor and detail. Like all such grandiose endeavors, this idea was dashed to the ground by the time consuming and chubby fists of babyhood.

So instead I bring you Humorous Highlights from the Law and Motherhood (sanitarium) household.

In the doghouse:

Devon: “The doggie dictator Pisspot returns from the peeing fields of DogBodia!”

In the Kitchen:

Lee: “By the way honey, you look beautiful, and the house looks fantastic.”
Me: pause “Why are you trying to creep me out?”

At dinner:

Me: “The meat is a little salty, I was trying to do that crust thing you do, but I don’t think it worked.”
Lee: grimace “No honey, it’s fine. I like salty meat, and I think it’s really interesting how you managed to get the salt in the crust to permeate all the way through the meat. Great flavor!”

Concerning “sexual relations”:

Me: “The kids are asleep… we could go fool around a little.”
Lee: “Oooh, we could!…. but I was going to play World of Warcraft.”
Me: “Sweet! I am almost level 43! Can you take me hunting for dragonscale?”