Flesh eating bugs

The one where they get eaten alive by mosquitos…

Monkey and I are covered in mosquito bites. We simply can’t seem to avoid the blood-sucking parasites. Every day I douse the two of us in Off, and every day we have little red nibbles all over our legs and ankles. I even get bites on my feet, the bottoms of my feet!!! It is so bad I am considering getting a pet bat. Yes folks!! A bat! I am thinking about buying a bathouse and placing it on the roof. Maybe attracting a few bats to the yummy bug smorgasbord that is my backyard.

New Jersey is teeming with life! Creepy crawlies abound here. I encountered the largest free range spider I have ever seen in my gardening shed. Consequently, I will not be entering the gardening shed, of my own free will, again. It was easily the size of a silver half-dollar, and that was just it’s vile, fuzzy body. Yeehhehhh. I saw it, it saw me, but I was out of there with the door slammed securely shut before it could act on any plan of attack.

We have crickets, fleas, ticks, mosquitos, grasshoppers, spiders, tiny little red bugs, and god only knows what else! I definately need a pet bat. Granted, owning bats as pets is generally a bad idea, and some of the rarer species are illegal pets, but I can certainly build a bat house and try to lure one of them to me. Here little bat, come eat these lovely bugs, check out the spider in the shed, come eat at McMisty’s!!

We have got to do something. I could put up a bug zapper but I am afraid it would be so busy killing bugs that it would keep the neighbors awake, or maybe blow the neighborhood power grid. (Which seems a little dodgy anyway, given we have lost power several times in the 12 days we have been here.)

At least Monkey can enjoy catching bugs. And we do have an abundance of butterflies and fireflies, so I shouldn’t complain too much; BUT THE REST OF THEM ARE ICKY!!!

Off the bug topic, we are settling in. The final chapter of the gross carpet saga will be resolved this week, and we will be able to get our stuff moved in and set Monkey’s room up. Finally. We will be able to hang up and put away our clothes, and get all her toys out, and have a house, wherein we can actually live.

I am going to go spray some more Off! around,

Your Denver Girl, signing off.


We are having a baby!!

Well…. I was going to wait to announce the incoming cuteness until after my first doctor’s appointment but I mentioned it in my last blog post, because my brain is tired, and so I had better announce it now!!

Lee and I are having a baby. Monkey is going to be a big sister. We are about a month along, and so far it is not too bad. I am a little tired most days, I have days when I do not want to leave my bed, but there is no exorcist vomiting as of yet! Yay!

We will be seeing the doctor some time next week, I need to set up an appointment and do whatever it is I need to do to choose a doctor, etc.

In response to Kathleen and Tracy, I would love a party! We will have to see when we can have it, but I am guessing over Christmas/Yule/Chanukah/Holiday break. We should be able to be back for a long bit around then, at least the small one and I.

On an unrelated topic, Judge Harrell sent me this link, and it was pretty neat!

Secret Worlds, the Universe Within.

Love you all, miss you all,

Your pregnant Denver Girl, signing out.


Kevin Smith… a walk on the beach… and the Corleone family…

Last night we went to see Kevin Smith and Clerks in the park in Red Bank. Lee and I were sent to get food while Morgan and Devon reserved a space in the park. We ended up parking at home and walking from our house, heavily laden down with Cluck-U chicken, because over 2000 people showed up. tee hee. So when we finally arrived, Kevin Smith was just about to start the pre-presentation Q&A. It was pretty funny. He took questions for about an hour, was generally humorous, humorously rude, and kind. Then they showed the movie. It was about the experience you can expect from watching a film on a giant inflatable screen, in a windy park, on a blanket, on the hard ground, pregnant. But, it was fun, and Lee would occasionally kiss my shoulder, and I had chicken. My favorite part was definately the Q&A.

Today Ellen and I took the kids to the beach. After being stuck in traffic on the Garden State Parkway for about an hour and a half, we found this wonderful place in Manasquan. The ocean was only about a foot to a foot and a half deep for about 50 feet out. The water was warm. The kids were able to splash and run around and play. This was a huge step up from Monkey’s and my last few beach visits. Usually she and I cling to each other desperately as the cold waves try to suck us out to sea. We played for about an hour and a half. Seth (who is 6 months old) even liked the beach.

The odd thing was the Jellyfish. They were ALL over the place but no one was bothered by them. They didn’t sting. I had them constantly hitting against my body as we were walking in the water, but didn’t have anything painful occur. (Although it was creepy to have them touching me.) The kids were even catching them and playing with them. I thought they looked, and felt, like silicon breast implants. It was weird.

Afterwards we stopped by this little beach-side cafe and I ran inside to quickly order a snack for the three hungry, and now tired, children. I ordered 2 sides of fries and a small coffee. The woman behind the counter proceeded to plod over to the fryer, toss in the fries, plod over to the coffee maker, brew a pot. I decided to add some hot dogs to my order since it was obviously going to take a while. While I waited for the food, her mother got a phone call. I swear that these people were connected to the Corleone family. She kept saying “Haven’t I been nice to you Michael?” ” I am always doing favors for you and you disrespect me” etc. She even had the New Jersey italian accent and the accompanying gestures. Finally, her sloth-like daughter brought me the food in a large box (like the ones you load your groceries into at a Cost-co) and I fled before a rival family came in to shoot up the place.

After we got back I made my first Chicken Parmagiana. It was yummy. It was one of those cooking experiences I love. I actually had to substitute all or part of each ingredient except the chicken. I needed 2 cups of bread crumbs and some flour, but only had 1/2 a cup of bread crumbs and some corn meal. I needed a full can of spaghetti sauce, but only had 1/2 a can and a can of fire roasted dices tomatos. The recipe called for mozarella cheese, I only have mini-babel cheeses and cheddar. However, it worked out well, and I am looking forward to actually being able to cook it according to recipe in the future.

Well, your Denver girl is signing off, I get sooooo tired soooo early these days!!

Love you all, save a little mountain for me.

Smashed like bug

A new carpet!!!

We won!! Sent the letter to the landlord and now we are having all the carpets torn out at no cost to us! Yay!! Even better, they replaced the carpet in the family room yesterday so the house smells better and Monkey has a little play area set up! Finally, no more super bored child at my heels day and night!
I feel better. The whole carpet thing should be done and over by the beginning of next week and we can (finally) move in.

Today Monkey is staying the night at Ellen’s while Lee and I go see Kevin Smith and a screening of Clerks. (Not Clerks II). It should be neat. Jay and Silent Bob’s Secret Stash is here in Red Bank, so it makes sense that Kevin Smith would come here for a special event. We are looking forward to it as we both loved that movie. (This may say something unflattering about our personalities but cest la vie.)

This morning we had to go to the ER to get the results of our Saturday throat cultures. They were supposed to call us and tell us the results, but no one had. I called them and they told me HIPPA prevents them from giving our info out over the phone and we had to come in person. (Never mind that I had previously signed a release allowing them to tell me over the phone). So, down to the hospital we go, to the place the person on the phone told me to bring my ID. Except the person there told me I had to go down to records, where they made me fill out another release for each of us and had me wait while they contacted the lab. (Nevermind that the person on the phone has said printouts were already waiting for me.) Finally, we got our records, indicating that no, we do not have strep and we can discontinue the anti-biotics. sigh. This is HIPPA in the extreme. There is no legal reason I should be unable to get my own bloody health records without signing three seperate releases.

However, despite being heavily populated by HIPPA extremists, Red Bank is starting to grow on me. The state of New Jersey is still rife with petty annoyances and difficulties that insure I will not lovingly sigh and call it home for quite some time.

How I long to pump my own gas!! Apparently, there was a bill up to allow New Jersians to pump their own fuel, but one of it’s biggest opponents argued that there would be state wide panic because no one here had ever had to pump their own gas before and would have a hard time learning how. (Oh yeah, the 10 seconds it took me to figure out how to pump my gas at 16 when dashing off with my brand new driver’s license will break the simple minds of this guy’s constituents.) A guy at Lee’s work has an interesting plan for combatting this brilliant legislator’s argument. He wants to visit gas stations under the cover story that he is traveling across the country, having never left Jersey before, and is terrified he will be unable to pump his own gas. He plans on asking all the station attendants he can find to “teach” him how. If nothing else, it should be an entertaining blog to read when all said and done.

For all you law geeks: Is a law restricting citizens from learning how to pump their own fuel an unreasonable limitation on interstate commerce? Is this terror of self-pumping chilling New Jersians right to travel freely among the other states?

I know, too much time and too little law make Scylla go something, something.

More tomorrow,

Denver Girl signing out.

It’s just another manic Saturday?

Monkey has strep throat! Yes indeedy. She chose the 8 day period of time where we are not in Colorado, yet still insured by Colorado companies, to get ill. Yay! So, we end up at the relatively efficient emergency room waiting for most of our Saturday afternoon. I had them check me out too, and let me tell you! Getting two people with two seperate names and two seperate insurances registered is a pain in the A*$!!

But we were seen and medicated, so we are on the mend.

On the house side… Our landlord is dealing in bad faith with us and I want to smash him like bug!!
Many of you may have heard about the carpets. For those who haven’t, here is a summation. When we moved in the carpets reeked of cigarette smoke and animal urine. We called the landlords, who arrived in person to talk about it three days later. They stated clearly and unequivocally that they were always intending to replace the carpets, and the guy, John assured me that rather than make us pay to remove them, he and his son in law would remove them personally that week.

Nearly a month later, we have cigarette smelling, animal pee carpets.

Even worse, he stopped by the other day and asked me if we were paying to remove the carpets!! I find out from Lee that he had asked him the same thing several days before, and got a strident NO!! So why is he asking me? Why? Luckily, all I said was “we can talk later.” And he said, “yeah, we can work something out.”

Now I am furious, he is dealing in bad faith. I am going to research like mad to discover all I can about NJ law and renting, so I can smash him like bug. This is crap.

So he is coming Monday with the guy from Lowes to handle the Family room carpets, and I am going to hand him a letter informing him that he is acting in bad faith, not honoring his previous agreement with us, failing to repair the premises in the required reasonable time, and that I will be hiring someone to remove them, and will deduct the cost from the rent. Then I will see what he does, but I would feel very comfortable fighting his two-faced butt in court right now, so I really don’t think he will say anything.

Argh!! Send me strength! Send me calm! And if you are a law school friend, send me statutes and cases that will support or harm my position!!

Your Denver Girl, rolling up her sleeves and getting ready to fling some cow patties.

Job hunting?

Well….. I submitted my resume to Vonage yesterday….

Because apparently they don’t have enough of us working there!! No really, its a combination “bring in money, combat insanity” move on my part. I am feeling unsettled, in part because we are unsettled, but mostly because I am used to working. I have always worked. Me not working has always been a little manic.

For example, this was my “day off” today:
8 am – woke up, made coffee, showered, dressed Monkey, dressed myself, drove Lee to work.
9 am – searched entire house for lease agreement so I could sign Monkey up for school.
10 am – got directions to the school
11 am — enrolled Monkey in school, drove home for lunch
noon — ate a lovely lunch of cheese, chicken, peaches and plums with Monkey while we watched the Berenstain Bears.
1 pm – Took Monkey to the knitting store for a crochet needle (closed my wallet to the balls and balls of lovely, lovely yarn), the metaphysical store (watched the clerk cry into the phone and try really hard not to let me see it), and then the Cold Stone Creamery for watermelon ice cream.
2:30 – put Monkey down for a nap, crocheted a headband (my first incorporating beads) while watching Law and Order.
3:30 – Crocheted a necklace. (This one also incorporating beads, and also while watching Law and Order).
4:10 – Came upstairs to read email and post on my blog. (Hello!!)

Later I will clean a little, wake Monkey up, go get Lee, and cook dinner.

This is me relaxing, which is why I am much more relaxed when I get to go to work, pay someone else to clean, buy my headbands and necklaces, and spend my home time playing with small child.

So yes, I have applied to Vonage, and if I am too afraid that working there might make me cross over to the dark side, the metaphysical store is hiring, and I am sure I could launch back into the world of spiritual advising, drum circles, and exorcisms with little or no problem.

Still missing my Denver crew…. M

Shelf paper and temper tantrums….

Regardless of how “easy to apply” shelf paper may claim to be, I have yet to come across any that actually is easy to apply. If it doesn’t stick to itself, it doesn’t stick to the object to which it is applied. We are re-papering our kitchen cabinets, as the person before us felt that white plastic and packing tape were appropriate tools for shelf covering. The shelves themselves are a dark and forbidding particle board. Ick. Not that the re-papered shelves look much better than particle board, but at least you can see when they are dirty!!

Today was a hard day, continued resistance from the Monkey front occurred all afternoon. I tried to get her to take a nap, mainly because she wouldn’t entertain herself long enough to let me finish any work, and that did not go over well. It began with the normal resistance; “I’m not tired”, “Can I just rest?”, “If I can’t sleep can I play?” and then became a full fledged attack! “I am going back to Colorado without you!!”, “I hate it here!!”, “I don’t want to live here with you!” etc. I maintained robot mom status, calmly informed her she wasn’t leaving the state without us, and then told her her choices were nap, or grounded in her room until it was time to get her father. An hour later she was asleep. (Thankfully)

Still, a hard day. with many tears on her part and a dull headache on mine. So when she woke up we went and got Pizza Hut to try and restore good humor. Luckily it worked. She and I were happily singing away in the car and giggling all the way to get Lee.

Well, it is getting more real. This whole “Crap! I live here now!!” feeling. I keep expecting to get on the plane home, but each day, there is less of that, and more of a sense of permanency. Not a sense of home, but a sense of permanency.

Oh! Last night we were getting Monkey to bed when she started yelling ” a firefly mama! A firefly!” AND THERE THEY WERE!! All these little bugs with light up bottoms flying around my front yard. Neither she nor I had ever seen one before, so we got to share that experience together. Which was very, very special. After it got really dark, I got her out of bed to look for more, but alas, they were finished with thier light show for the night. I will have to try and catch some on film.

Missing you all…

Your Denver girl, signing out on the east coast.

Whimsy and Wonder

Original artwork by Misty Morehead

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